We’ll all experience it at some point, and there’s no way around it. Grief is one of the most devastating things a person can endure, and it’s excruciating when it’s due to the loss of someone near and dear. Here, we go over the stages of grief and how to deal with them after a loved one passes away.
Denial
You know they’re gone, but you still wait for them to walk through the door or pick up the phone. Denial is the first stage of grief, and it isn’t very easy. It refers to our difficulty grasping the reality of loss, and it can take some time for us to realize that things will never be the way they used to be. During grieving, you may:
· Believe it’s all a dream or a mistake and your loved one is still here.
· Act like everything is okay when it isn’t.
· Refuse to discuss the loss.
· Throw yourself into work or hobbies so you don’t have to face your feelings.
With help from a mental health therapist arlington tx, you can get past denial and see the world for what it is.
Anger
A natural response to a devastating loss, anger can be directed in various ways. In some people, it appears as blame—feeling that someone else caused it. As with the other stages of grief, anger isn’t always rational, but it’s important to learn how to cope with it.
Bargaining
The process sometimes starts before a loss occurs, such as when a wife promises never to argue with her husband again if he survives a cancer diagnosis. It can happen afterward, though, and it often manifests as “if only” thoughts.
· “If only we’d chosen a different doctor, he would still be here.”
· If she wasn’t rushing to work, she wouldn’t have been in the accident.”
These statements may not seem like a negotiation tactic, but the thought process is much the same. Bargaining is one of our main ways of coping with grief, as we try to roll back the clock and undo things we can’t change.
Depression
It’s natural to feel sad when a loved one passes away, and it can be challenging to cope with depression. Symptoms may include:
· Hopelessness.
· Feeling confused about your future.
· Trouble focusing.
· Difficulty with decision-making.
Depression manifests itself physically, too, appearing as insomnia, aches, pains, and inflammation in the body. By seeking help for depression when you’re grieving, you will improve your mental and physical health.
Acceptance
When grieving someone you love, feelings of sadness may never fade. During this stage, however, you’ll learn to live with those feelings and acknowledge the reality of the loss. Acceptance occurs when you finally grasp the finality of the situation, realizing that you can feel sorrow and hope at the same time.
Grief: How Long Will it Last?
There’s no firm timeline for grief, and anyone telling you to get over it or move on is doing you a disservice. With that said, the length of the process may depend on several factors. Uncomplicated grief may resolve itself within two years of a loss, while complicated grief can last for several years and be debilitating.
When to Seek Help
If you experience intense distress or cannot return to your normal routine after losing someone, consider seeking professional help. Talking about the loss, sharing your feelings, and having your grief validated can hasten healing. We all need a little help when dealing with grief, and you’ll find it in a therapist’s office.