No one can ignore the self-care movement that is prevalent in our society. Mom’s all over the world are embracing the movement more than any other group. An article in the New York Post states in a survey of 2,000 parents, moms and dads, on average, get only 32 minutes of “me time” each day. This movement has given us permission to take care of ourselves and our families too. Many of us moms are directly equating self-care with self-love. So when I had the opportunity to read, “The Self-Love Revolution: Radical Body Positivity for Girls of Color” Virgie Tovar I welcomed the opportunity. Self-love is about knowing who you are internally and seeking joy and acceptance within yourself. This book will be at the foundation of today’s discussion.
Self-Love is About Looking Within First
Frankly, I had to ask myself why was self-love so attractive to me now as an adult? Although, I’ve never struggled with weight now 11 years postpartum my family sometimes makes comments about my weight, mainly the belly fat that I have, which still exists. To be honest I’m hurt by their words and their attempts to point out my physical “imperfections.” At the same time though, I love my new womanly curves and find beauty within my belly that helped me carry my twins. The scars my body bares are beautiful within my own eyes, and that’s what self-love is all about.
The Book, “The Self-Love Revolution”
Thus, the book, “The Self-Love Revolution: Radical Body Positivity for Girls of Color” is for teenagers and young women. I highly recommend the book, because it challenges the traditions of negativity and gives young girls insight into who they are becoming as they grow and develop. However, as a millennial woman learning to accept myself and model body positivity in front of my daughters I realize that this message is a journey. It will take more than one book to right centuries of female societal shame. The middle and end of the book resonated with me the most causing me to jot down several quotes that I will add to my list of affirmations. Here are my two favorites:
- Our culture tells everybody to be thin — no matter what their parents or ancestors look like–and that is just super weird. The truth is: conformity does not nourish us or make us happy, in the end Honoring who we really are–including our body, exactly as it is–does (Tovar, 63).
- Behaviors and ideas are inheritances as well . . . they get passed down from generation to generation (Tovar, 77).
Now, accepting the ideology that self-love is important, what do we do next? Thankfully, the book has journal prompts and action steps that the reader can take interspersed throughout each chapter. Truthfully, to make this a continual movement we can’t stop there. Instead, we have to make a list of what self-love is to us. Then, decide how we can best practice it and implement it into our lives.
Below is my self-love list:
- Practice saying positive affirmations.
- Set boundaries with others.
- Make restful sleep a priority.
- Wear clothes that make you feel pretty, comfortable, and classy.
- Hold your head up and look people in their eyes.
- Practice good posture.
- Forgive, it’s freeing.
- Don’t apologize unnecessarily.
- Practice saying, “No.”
- Make time for my dreams and goals.
Your list may look different from mine, just like my list is different from Virgie Tovar’s but the goal is to start with knowing what matters to you. So take a few minutes to jot down how self-love is important to you.
This review was written on behalf of Real Clever, all opinions are mine.
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