After Kids Dating can be a True Balancing Act

Yellow Sticky Love Note #2
Yellow Sticky Love Note #2 (Photo credit: madlyinlovewithlife)

This year one of my goals was to spend more time with my husband. Although, we met years ago and have grown up together, I feel like we are just now coming of age and really getting to know ourselves. I also realize  that after having kids we need to make more conscious choices to keep our love fresh and continue to grow in love and unity. I say it all the time, “Marriage is difficult,” well at least it can be. I recently read an article in Women’s Day regarding infidelity within marriage that stated, “the key is prevention. Continue to be the woman he first fell for throughout your marriage” source. Finding time to be that woman, after you have children is not easy. Your time, energy, and appearance are all different; however continuing to make your spouse a priority in your life is important. Below are some tips on dating because it can be a true balancing act after you have children.

By nature, many people are more interested in how to benefit themselves, but marriage is about working together and benefiting each other. This concept is easier to write about then to truly put into practice in reality, but it one of the most important. After having children it is so important to maintain your love for each other. One of the best ways to reconnect is by organizing a regular dating life.

  1. Hang out. Depending upon what your time allows try to schedule a breakfast, lunch, or dinner between just the two of you at least once a week.
    • Some things to do together are:
      • Take a long walk in the park, beach, or around your neighborhood
      • Go to the movies/watch a movie together
      • Attend a concert together
      • Go dancing or karaoke.
      • Take a class together
      • Take a boat ride or cruise, with just the two of you
      • Paint a picture together
      • Cook a meal together
      • Take photos that intrigue each of you, narrate them, and organize them together to make a book or collage.
      • Enjoy playing a game together.
      • Exercise together.
      • Go on a picnic together and take a long with a you conversation box. Inside the box fill it with positive conversation starters. Make some of them funny because humor often keeps married couples smiling.
      • Go camping in your backyard. Getting a tent and enjoying your yard together doesn’t cost much and may be adventurous.
      • Create a date box, where you both add all of your exciting dating ideas. You both will have years to come to try to fulfill each one.
  2. Take turns trying-out each other’s hobbies. Overtime it is likely, that a few of your interests have changed. Try to share some of your new interests with your spouse so he or she can get to know the things you enjoy doing.
  3. Write love notes. Pen and paper are not relics of the past, use them to say loving words toward each other. Sometimes hearing the positive words will also help guide our actions in a positive direction.
  4. Present your spouse with a unique original gift. Chances are you possess a unique talent, maybe you sing, write, draw, dance, build things, etc. Whatever your skill is, try to share your gift with your spouse. Most likely he or she will cherish it because it is from you.
  5. Embrace each other. Every now and then you should just enjoy the presence of the other person being around you. Romance each other and be intimate. Remember all of this is an important part of your relationship too.

Reader Response: What are some creative dating ideas that you enjoy?

Marriages are worth fighting for.

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