Every child needs some form of discipline and a set of boundaries. In the past, many parents recited this proverb as if it were directly from the Bible, “Spare the rod or spoil the child” to justify their actions. However, the phrase itself cannot be found in the Bible. Today, it is not only controversial to spank your child, but it is also a criminal act in some states.
I recently read an article on Parents website that reports a Texas mother was given 5 years probation for spanking her daughter on her bottom. The article goes on to report that ” A Child Protective Services spokesperson told KZTV, a Corpus Christi station, that though the law does not forbid spanking, the practice is criminal when it injures a child.” Of course, this sounds reasonable, but after reading the article it seems that the word “injures” does not have a clear definition. The child’s grandmother saw red bruises on the girl’s bottom and took her to the hospital. Instead of wrestling with the concept of how hard a hit has to be before bruises appear, parents should be taught good respectable and effective forms of discipline.
Many parents continue to spank their children because they do not know a better alternative. Here are some gentle discipline techniques, shared by Faith Davis, LCSW, LCAS-P ” Tips for Successful Gentle Discipline.”
QUESTIONS FOR YOU
- What are some of the gentle methods you use to discipline your child?
- Would you continue to spank your child/children after hearing about this case?
- Do you agree or disagree with the sentence this Texas mom received?
- What unique factors about each should be taking into consideration when you plan out your discipline strategies?
What effect does your child’s temperament have on his or her behavior?
I like the post by A Place of Our Own, a website and television show, which has a forum on their site that discusses temperament, discipline and children. The fact remains that every individual person has their own unique needs and what strategies parents use to discipline one child may not work for another child. Elizabeth Sanchez the host of the Temperament and Discipline segment advises parents to:
- Recognize & respect your child’s temperament
- Anticipate how your child will behave & plan ahead
- Use strategies to help him learn appropriate behavior
- [Don't label your child's temperament] because there are no good or bad temperaments
- Click here to view the video on their site
One of the only universal parenting techniques is love and it should be at the basis of everything we do. Love your child when you are disciplining him or her. The book “5 Languages of Children” by Gary Chapman is a great book for parents to read because it helps us adapt our parenting style to how our children feel, recognize, and receive love.